Too Much of a Good Thing

I'm uncomfortable with the status quo. I want the biggest life I can imagine and will happily endure mental, physical, and emotional stress to get it. I seek out change and challenge. This drive has led me to move cities, to change my career, to divorce, to push myself physically to the point at which I question my sanity while trying not to puke, and to move houses enough that I'm every realtor's dream client. 

Last year, my husband died. An overdose of change and challenge. Navigating sorrow from the loss of my person. A major shift in my career as I dug in to the operations of our family business. And small things that felt massive; the house moving from ours to mine as I slowly packed up his things, trading in our cars and choosing one on my own for the first time in two decades, and replacing our Saturday morning dates with a new solitary routine.

There's a profound difference between intentionally taking on a challenge and a shocking blast that rocks the bedrock of life. But I've discovered a few things that help me navigate change regardless of its magnitude or source. An optimistic disposition. Cultivated gratitude. A strong work ethic. And most importantly, a conviction that I can handle anything. Bring it on. (Actually don't. It sounded good but I'd like a little status quo for now.)